A Million Dollar Slap Industry!!

2008 or 2009.I dont remember (always get scolded for not remembering the dates). Remember you played the notorious game HIT BUSH!! Ya all you had to do was to precisly aim at Mr. Bush and painstakenly click a mouse button to throw shoes, sandals, eggs, tomatoes, omellete and what not (and you scored points for doing that!!).

WHAT's the point buddy?? ya i am coming to it. The point is simple. Be it ONE SLAP or ONE SHOE it doesnt matter. It doesnt matter whether the shoe hits or not. Neither does it matter that the slap was a tight one straight on chubby cheeks.  All that matters is the billion dollar industry that these great men who get slapped churn out. BILLION (are you out of your mind)!! No sweetheart its not yet Friday night.

Just think about it, the moment the shoe was thrown away the shoe company made its mark on the planet for the first time. Thousands of shoes were sold in few hours. The shoe became the token of bravery (all medals failed!!). Kudos to Mr Bush for he inspired several games. Remember he did some fantastic matrix move to save himself. Yes this is what churned out a whole gaming industry. There were practically 2 sides. One in which you had to hit Bush and the other in which you had to save bush (Obviouslly we enjoyed the former). Tshirts, mugs, pencils, school bags, ribbons (you name it) etc etc all had the famous shoe thrower photo on them.

Our desi version of a similar incident happened a few weeks back. A guy slapped Sharad Pawar (the only man who knew nothing about agriculture and still happened to be the Agriculture minister Of the Great India). Well it can happen only in India. Our desi version was a lot better than the Videshi one. There were no velocity calculation, angle calculation, wind speed taken into account.(NOTHING at all. All this was required in shoe throwing). Just a straight simple slap (chamataa or thapaaak as we call it). It was right on target and had its effect. Soon after the slap again a billion dollar indusrty was churning out. Facebook got flooded with people sentiments, news channel got their sweetest report of the year, some intelligent think tanks (naam hai sidhu) got themselves on discusion rounds again (Faaltu ka footage), dirty politics, sms companies got a reason to smile again, thousands of like pages, blogs (mine is exceptional!! :P), songs, videos and what not were created. Sardars just got famous again (Again?? Yea Rajnikant Killed santa banta).

BUt yes the financial analysis states that the videshi version minted more money than the desi one.(The analysis is done purely by me!!) Well there is a reason to it. Firstly we just slapped sharad pawar and the videshi guy tried his hand on Mr. Bush. (Well it doesnt matter if sharad pawar has more money than Bush . After all there are somethings money cant buy.) Secondly the trend had just got old. What trend??? Slapping only people from political background. Cmmon if you need to capture market you gotta be new and fresh. This time try on some corrupt government babus, corrupt policemans, corrupt coaches. TRY THEM!! And for sure this time we will cross the billion dollar mark.

I Go U Go Kolaverii Krazzy!!

Rythem Correct!! Naa its perfect.

Lyrics awsome or should i say aiyyo-some!!

onee... yo twoo... let the kolaveri ride begin.

Has south entertainment industry really taken over the Bollywood?? SRK dont be scared. I yumm
just asking a question not stating a fact. Ghajini, Bhool BHulaiya, Judwa, Mr and Mrs
Khiladi etc etc share all somthing in common. Aiyyoo wotss that???? JUST wait daaa. I yummm telling
onlyyy!!! They all, like countless other movies, are remakes of hit southern movies.

The trend continued from movies to actresses (Not talking about Reshma ji.. NO Offence though :P).
Aishwarya, Hansika, Shruti, Genelia, . Name any most wanted actresses and they really got some
deep down connection (DIRTYY MIND!! i mean deep down south India connection).

Have a bet with me, 1 or 2 years from now and you will find a remixed bollywood version of the
KOLAVERI DI. Courtesy Pritam dada.(Cmmon the guy is so orignal!! He only copies the rythem, the
starting, the end and a litle mid part of the songs. SO WHATT)

Anyways guys do hear the song and enjoy your day.

YES I Studied In India...

WARNING: This article is only for desi boys and gals because the words used hereafter will be purely for the desi public. Still you can keep googling them but have a bet with me this is where even google feels unlucky!!

RAttofying, Ghotofication, forming my own theories during exams, modifying countless theories of reknowned scientists (trust me this takes a hell lot of brainstorming), extending answers with no substanial info (when i say extend i mean atleast a page), decorating my exam paper by drawing lines and by using multicoloured pens (was time consuming but i did it), surfing internet for more info (this is just to get permission from mom to surf internet), endless breaks in between studies etc etc. You just name it, i did it ALL. All this pain just to score good marks and by good i mean atleast above 85 out of 100 and definetly not the passing marks 40 (40 marks ki keemat tum kya jaano....). Now everytime you score good marks and study hard, you know a magical thing happens, and the magic is that you strengthen your base and concepts for the next standard. Believe it or not this is what i have been told all my life and i can safely assume that i am not alone who has been fed this crap. Typical dialogue "aise hi base banta hai aagey k liye..."

But the TRUTH is, a hard one to believe unless you are the victim of it, that it never matters what you did in all your school life, it never matters how brilliant you were in sports, arts, music, plays etc etc. and it does not even matter how much you scored in your board exams though the board exams are portrayed as the deadliest villain right from the time you enter 8th standard. Everything that matters is how well you score in a competitive exam and in my lovely beautiful India the only competitive exams are the IIT-JEE, AIEEE and CAT (of course we have a lot more exams but they do not share the same limelight). That fateful day, that particular time those 3 hours of competitive exam is what decides your entire path of life (1 in a million exceptions are not really counted here). This is because if you dont ace that particular exam on that particular day you will see yourself turned into a total zero (of course others will make you think so) for the  rest of your life. Laga laga shockkk laga but trust me even HAVELLS is no good at that time. So moral of the story is that one day that decides a lot of things. So rather make that day your lucky day and we know how to do that after all India, astrology and faith go hand in hand. You think i am kidding NOT at all (switch on any HNC after 12 am and 12 pm and you will know).

Now i am not a fan or well wisher of Kapil Sibal but the guy did one thing really right and that is scrap up the whole 10th standard boards exam. Now at this point all of us who gave our boards might be wanting to criticise me but just relax guys, take a break, have thanda, juice or beer and put your mind to rest and THINK what good did that 10th standard marksheet do. Well stop thinking (cmmon stop it.. enough... stop stop), i ll tell you it best played the role of a date of birth proof for your driving license (DL as we call it). If you can find a bigger use of that marksheet, I am really all ears (bigger doesnt mean you go environment friendly and say we can ofcourse recycle it). And the endless pressure that is created for no reason. Thanks to HRD ministry for doing something good (i dont want to thank kapil thats why HRD :P).

Another move to have just one particular entrance exam is again widely criticized (some dont even know why they are criticing it but then you dont want to look like a fool doing nothing, so they just end up copying others). I dont criticize it at all because the ONE INDIA EXAM plan will in reality be a stress-burner, environment friendly (will save lot of papers), and a centralised and an organised process. Sounds similar to GRE, GMAT and SAT. Some argue that selection process would dilute (now screw you!!). Dilution occured long back when government started reservation. Its obvious these people (by these i mean, the people i just screwed) dont really want to bring up this issue because you know they just made the most out of it, cleared the LIMELIGHT exam.

A lot can be written and a lot i wanted to write but maybe next time. As of now i really need to finish up a practical file (yeahhh i need to... dun give me that look!!) because this is how engineering is done in india. I will touch upon engineering next time. Till then bby.

Who hacked my Facebook Profile??

Well while i was discussing about my very first blog article with my girlfriend, she suggested that i should rather name it "who hacked my life??". Funny but she is damn right. Fbeeeinng has really become the integral part of our life, atleast my life, yes it has!! Initially i could say not a day passes without me logging into facebook, but now only the duration reference needs to be changed and i will rather say that not an hour passes without fb. Now before i move onto write about those Anonymous Group (not one of my close friends :P ) who hacked into fb, lets just have a brief look into facebook journey for a while.

Now many of you have watched social network, so i m not getting into the winkelvoss bro's or the investor saverin's role in fb but rather how fb slowly evolved from being a social site to connect with friends and family to how it has become more of a platform for various companies to target its customers. Morning news, indian standard time, Pay Pal launches itself on facebook helping users to send money to there friends. Pay pal is just one of its kind there are many companies who have launched themselves on fb before paypal. For example embeepay allows users to get there mobile recharged, Washigton post reader allows you to read world news and some of the best articles. Connecting socially, creating platforms for applications, games, video chating etc etc u named it, fb created it. As announced in "f8", fb 's tech meet, facebook is to introduce timeline, fb music, a new class of social apps, and lots more.

But they say where goes the good, follows the evil. Well call the Anonymous Group (i will be calling it AG from now on) an evil one but they sure taught us one thing that nothing is immune, no system is perfect, there are loopholes and you better recognise them or someone else would do the work for you. The "fawkes Virus" is rumoured to hack the profiles. BUt mind you they are just rumours. As of now the good part is, hackers were tracked, trapped and caught. As one of the spokerperson from fb said "We've built enforcement mechanisms to quickly shut down the malicious Pages and accounts that attempt to exploit it". Kudos!!!! Nice work but it would have been lot better had your enforcement mechanism sensed the danger before and saved pitty users who never really knew what hit them.

Anyways before i give rest to my fingers and put my mind to peace, let me just brief you up with the security system employed by facebook. Facebook employs a defence known as Facebook Immune System designed to automatically flag fake profiles. The immune system uses a combination of three system to combat attacks- friend request classifiers, fake account classifiers and rate limiting techniques. Well the above info is only and only for the computer nerds and geeks and programmers and coders and hackers (sorry i rant out of synonyms), so normal people (the ones who use computers to watch movies, listen to song, browse internet, forward indefinite mails, play games, downloading countless useless so called softwares etc etc.) like me can just chill out and need not worry much about the above part. Because in the end everything is going to be OKAY!!